Monday, August 28, 2006

Men, Mom and Mechanics

Just having written that title, I suddenly realize how these three things have something in common: They all require costly upkeep from me.

I had a very fun and frustrating weekend. It's an oxymoron, I know. But you will see.

Friday night I had plans to hang out with The Wild Young'ns: Mack Daddy, J-Rich and JD. I was really looking forward to it, as I hadn't hung out with this particular group of guy friends in a while. I threw on some jeans, put on my new shoes and some bronzer and I was all set. Or so I thought.

My car would not start. Great. I was already a half-hour late. Conveniently, my Weird-Yet-Nice neighbor happened to walk by as I was on the phone, explaining things to my friends. It turns out he is a mechanic. Perfect!

He checks under my hood and says he thinks it's my battery. He could jump me, but then I'd be stranded at the bars. Um, this doesn't really do me much good. We talked about it some more, as he explained what my options were at this point. I thought he said he could give me a ride, and I said "Great!" so I started to reach for the door handle to his car. "Um, I said I could give you a jump..." he said. Oh. I turned beet red. How embarrassing. How presumptuous! I wanted to die. Then, of course, to make it worse, he felt bad, and backpedaled--"But I guess I could give you a ride if you really need one." Good grief.

Just as I was about to take him up on the offer, I realized I should try calling someone else to give me a ride. I knew the Wild Young'ns would be far too gone to consider driving at this point (there is a reason they have this nickname!). K was on the other side of town with her friends. The Nurses were working or sleeping. There was only one person left. Repo.

He works on Saturday mornings, so I knew he wasn't doing anything. I called him. He gladly gave me a ride and even offered to pick me up later that night if I needed a ride home. So sweet. Points for him. To boot, he got to see me all decked out for a night on the town. Yes!

Finally, I met up with the semi-drunk guys. We decided to go to one of my favorite bars, Local's. J-Rich got drunk and wandered around. JD is a huge social butterfly, so he flitted around as well. This left me with Mack Daddy, which was great. Not because I like him or anything, but because this guy makes me laugh my ass off. He and I proceeded to sit together the whole night, busting our guts. We bring out the pervert in each other and just end up cracking up whenever we hang out. We played "Marry 'Em, Fuck 'Em, Throw Them Off a Cliff", which is perfect for two perverts to play because each round was more wrong than the last.

What, you've never heard of it? Oh, it's loads of fun, especially on girl's night out. Any number of people can play and you need no equipment. MJ taught it to me. Here is how you play:

1. Think of three people--celebrities, people you know, people in the bar, whatever. One time I did beer mascots, which was really funny--Clydesdale horses, an eagle or a woodchuck. Ha!
2. Turn to your friend and ask them which one they'd marry, which one they'd fuck and which one they'd throw off the cliff. It gets really interesting if you pick friends or exes! You can torture your friend into admitting secrets. Not that I've done that. I also like to pick themes, like, "80s Teen Heartthrobs" or "Moustaches".

So Mack Daddy and I played it most of the night, and we almost fell off our bar stools a couple times. It was great to share some laughs with him--he just moved to Charleston, so I won't be seeing him as much.

The next morning, I got my car jumped and took it to AutoZone, where they tested my battery. They said it was fine and there was nothing wrong with my car. I didn't totally buy that, but I left anyway, thinking I would just take my car in to my regular place on Monday morning. I figured it was just a fluke that it didn't start.

Nope. It wouldn't start any more after that, either--my jump was a one-time shot. So I was stuck at home all day Saturday. Oh well. Didn't have big plans anyway. I got to catch up on some sleep and watch a movie. Repo came over when he got off work and we hung out for a while. Then I went to bed.

The next morning, I was walking Sammy when I came upon a guy sitting on the curb. A hot guy. All alone, sweating in the hot sun. My curiosity was piqued, and apparently, so was Sammy's. He ran up to him, and the guy started petting Sammy. We got to talking...and I came to the conclusion that the guy was still drunk from the night before. "This should be good," I thought. The rest of my day was about to get interesting.

Anyway, this post is getting kind of long. So I think I will leave you guys hanging for today. I will finish this up tomorrow. Stay tuned for more about Random Drunk Guy, my car and The Czarina.


Vixen said...

You SUCK! Finish this story right now or else...I won't read ur blog for a whole week. Yeah.! How dare u leave it like that. I'm all bated breath and waiting for the rest of it ASAP.

Evil, evil woman!

Red said...

Yeah... That's just mean. What if I can't read tomorrow? What if my eyes are gouged out by a crazy blackbird on my way to the mailbox??

The Dummy said...

Yeah, you stink. Just like what everyone else said. ;)

Anne said...


No fair.

Hurry and finish it! Or call me and spill all the dirt.

You are such a tease!

Virginia Belle said...

*evil laughter*

HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!

seriously, it would have been a novel if i had finished it. will post part 2 today.

CharlestonGuy said...

Car starts sometimes, won't start other times = starter going bad slowly.

Replace your starter. Don't worry, it's probably not terribly expensive.

I'll bill you for my diagnosis. Tell your mechanic neighbor he is fired!

Virginia Belle said...

CG-- no, it's not my starter. the only reason it started was because i had just had it jumped. it proceeded to die again within an hour after that! my neighbor was looking at my engine in the pitch dark! he also said it was my battery or my starter.