Thursday, July 27, 2006

#3 Today...

Work is slow. What can I say? Random stuff...

A lady came in here yesterday with blue lipliner on. I shit you not. I could hardly listen to what she was saying, because her mouth was ringed in blue, and then she filled it in with lipstick in this color.

K is at the beach. She wants me to join her tomorrow. Then come back the next day. That would mean two hours each way. Gas is expensive. And the wearing of a bathing suit sounds really humiliating right now. Eh...(you see, I am going to the same beach with some friends in a couple of weeks for a long weekend, so...) I think she is just bored and wants company. Besides, Boss Lady is gone tomorrow, so work will be fun!!!

I have answered the same question about 547 times this week: "Do you have any literary criticisms about Frank O'Connor's 'First Confession'?" --and people wonder why I don't like my job.

I relapsed on the cigarettes. *ducks, avoiding things being thrown at her by readers.*

I found Jessica Simpson on MySpace. She ain't all that. (No, I wasn't stalking her. It was a coincidence, pointed out to me by someone.) She's pretty. I will give her that. I'm cooler. And much less psycho.

K and I have been getting Girls Gone Wild videos. Long story. (Navy Guy got drunk one night....) We keep trying to return them to sender, I swear! If they were better videos, I'd just keep them. But chick-on-chick action doesn't really do it for me.

I have been meaning to say hi to The Bostons. (Hii!!!) Talked to Mrs. Boston the other day and had a lovely conversation. I encouraged her to start a blog because she is hilarious. She informed me that I am somewhat of a celebrity among her friends up there, who all lurk on here. You lurkers, you! Leave a comment already! And I am not a celebrity, just a regular girl. Sheesh.

I am starving! I want Taco Bell. And I can't avoid the Elephant in the Blog any longer. On to what you really want to know about: my love life. Or lack thereof.

Ok, ok. I will admit it. Repo called me. I answered. We talked. About us. About what we each want. He doesn't really have time for a relationship (seriously, he works like 60 hour weeks), but he misses me. He needs to work through some personal things, but he doesn't want me out of his life. He can't be with me full-time, but he doesn't want to be with anyone else either. He doesn't understand why we can't see each other once a week and just date casually. He needs to get some of his life squared away, so I just need to be patient with him, because he doesn't know what he wants from life, from me, etc.

Do I stay and try the Supportive Role? Or tell him to bite me?
Is he full of s--t? Or am I not being very understanding?

I know you are all jumping to the same answer--"Screw him! He sucks!!"-- but it's always easier said than done. Shouldn't we work on relationships? You always hear people say relationships are hard work, but very few people are telling me to work on this. I don't click with people every day. I haven't felt like this about someone in years. I have given him several opportunities to break it off with me permanently, to go away, let this die, date other people, whatever. He keeps coming back. There must be something there, right? Otherwise, he'd be gone. And I could move on.

He wants to come over tomorrow night to talk. I have been invited to the beach tomorrow. He'll be upset if I cancel on him. But do I really owe him anything? What to do???

Anyone else ever been through this situation? What happened to you? Did you wait it out or throw in the towel?


stella said...

I think you need to make a list of the pros and cons. As unromantic as it sounds. I keep thinking too, what's the worst thing that would happen? That you'd hang around him once a week and wait for him to get his shit straightened out. Maybe it gets straightened out, maybe not. You'll loose some time in your life you can't get back, but maybe he'll get his shit together and it'll work out. I'm a risk taker, I say try it and if doesn't work out then at least you tried.

Red said...

I've been in that situation before, but I'm not going to go into it in the comment section.

What I will say is that you have to decide if half of his attention is enough for you, at least for now anyway, because it sounds like that's about what you'd be getting. Just don't put your life on hold so he can ding around and keep you on the back burner. It's no fun, trust me.. Been there..

CT said...

I've also been there, and I'd give the same advice as red. If you can be happy with the situation as is, knowing that it is possible that it isn't going to change any time soon (if ever) then give him a chance. Otherwise get on with your life. What's to say that you couldn't get back together later on if he does end up being ready for a real relationship. You don't necessarily have to make yourself a lady in waiting now. Just don't sell yourself short!

Matilda Jane said...

I couldn't read past the blue lip liner... so I didn't get to the rest of your blog... much too distracted with visual.

CharlestonGuy said...

Sounds like he wants to keep you as a booty call.

If I was working a lot I would still want to see J-dog - no matter how tired. In fact - that would be the one thing that would make all the hard work worth it - coming home to her!

What is wrong with this guy's life that he has to work 60 hours a week? If he's not a doctor or a lawyer he should consider a career change so that he can have a normal life. I've never been in a position where I had to work that much for a long period of time.

Either this guy is too dumb to find a reasonable job or he's making excuses to keep you hanging around for his own selfish reasons. Either way - this whole situation is way too hard. When people are meant to be together they don't go through crap like this.

This guy will never make you happy.

NotCarrie said...

Blue? did you hit her?

Becky said...

did you just say taco bell??? *swoons*

keep us posted on repo!

Gypsy said...

Relationships definitely take hard work. What you have to decide is if the work is worth the results. And perhaps you won't know til you try.

With my situation, our relationship has definitely been a lot of work. The payoff has been phenomenal and it was worth all the extra effort and pain.

If you decide he's worth struggling for, set some firm ground rules and don't let yourself come last.

Anonymous said...

I mean this in the most loving way but as Greg Behrendt so famously said, he's just not that into you. Walk away. You can meet the right guy when your spending time with someone who's not that into you.

Random Musings Of My Life said...

Serious, you have plans you should tell him as much.
If you do see him you will be back in the funnel cloud and swept up with all those old emotions ect.
Have no time for him and see what he does if he is persistant then make plans on another day.

sassafras said...

I haven't had much experience with this but I feel inclined to comment anyway. I tend to agree with the top two comments. See if you can make it work for you but definitely don't put your life on hold. At least this way you'll know for sure.

Jonathan said...

I agree, as long as you think he is worth it, stay around and see if things progress.

Anonymous said...

Ma'ams - It's Lady Starfish. I agree with Charleston Guy. I know you love repo and you want to "work things out" but Charleston is right when he said that he would make time for you if he wanted to do so. Here is what is going to happen. You are going to pretend like you are okay with this situation - lie to yourself, if you will. Then the old feelings are going to creep back in - you will confront Repo - he will not have changed at all and will still have his excuse attitude - you will get upset and realize that not only have you been wasting time, but also feel used. Not good. But I also know that a woman in love will do what she wants and has already made her mind up to what she is going to do. So I will be here no matter what. Sorry for the long blog but they are monitoring our email at work - f*cking Corporate America.

Anne said...

I have to tell you...before you were telling us what you really said..I was hoping that you said okay.

I dont know why. Maybe because I would have said okay. And it might be disasterous..but sometimes when you care about someone you take what you can get because a little of someone is better than none.

I have major goodbye issues though...

I hope you make the right decision for you...

Queue said...

Okay I'm leaving this comment because i'm neutral and i've just started reading your blog, and I like it and I'll be back and I think neutral is often helpful.

here we go..
by the way, i'm Raquita, nice to meet you

anywho - here we go.

truth is, men are simple. and this guy may be sincere in his desire to not be alone, he's also sincere in his refusal to put forth the effort to build with you.
example - I have a friend who dated a man for eight years only to leave him after the umteenth time he stated he wasn't ready for marriage/commitment, truth was he wasn't ready to marry HER - he married another woman with in a year.
it happened to me too, I dated a man for eight years, we broke up and he married one of the reasons we broke up with in six months.
Men go after the woman they want, they change and sacarafice, they make it happen when its what they want. there is no such thing as not enough time, or too many commitments, or too much work. They move things, change habits, find ways off - they sleep in your presence if they have to so you know they want to be with you, and thats how you know.
If you wanna just date this guy while you kick around the field, by almeans i'm all for dating openly, but if you are looking to settle down - then don't settle, the right man who wants to make it work and knows you are what he wants will come. I promise. and when it happens - you will have to work at the relationship - but you shouldn't have to work to know he's the one.

pleasure meeting you, sincerely,


truth of the matter

Laura said...

Blue lip liner lady just came in. Luckily, she did not ask me a question. Very strange.