Friday, July 14, 2006

Freaky Friday

I have been trying to find a Fun Friday link for y'all since I haven't done Fun Friday in a while. So far, all I have is this, which is really hilarious if you are a pervert like me. Oh, and this is dedicated to Sam, who will love this supposed interoffice notice from IBM:

Mouse Balls

On to my original intent for this post. So we ordered take-out for lunch today. The staff is sitting in the break room, munching away on subs, when Boss Lady relays this crazy story.

Her mother was walking around in a park or something in Texas. In 1968. She sees a bird on the ground. It is a Painted Bunting. She thinks to herself, "My, what a beautiful bird!" Then she realizes that it's dead.

So what does she do?

She grabs a napkin out of her purse, wraps it up and puts it back in her purse. Then she takes it home, places it into a child's shoebox, and puts it in her freezer.

It is still there.

It's been in her freezer since 1968. She has moved it from Texas to Colorado to Florida. They pack it in dry ice when they have to move it.

She has had a dead bird in her freezer since 1968. No joke. And no, I didn't ask what she plans on doing with it. I don't really want to know. I just wanted Boss Lady to change the subject.

Can you imagine walking around all day with a dead bird in your friggin' purse???

(Side note:My Dad, WLF, was into taxidermy. And he used to haul dead animals around, too. But in the back of his truck, not his pocket. And he didn't keep them for years, stored in the freezer. But that's another post.)

Can you imagine the conversations that must have taken place in her house?

"Mom, can I have a popsicle?"

"Sure, sweetie. They're right under the bird."

17 comments:

Becky said...

that is gross. lol!

jennster said...

LMFAO- does it look the same?! does it preserve itself int he freezer?!?1?!?

Red said...

That's just bizarre. I'm glad she didn't come across a cat. That may have taken up way too much room!

Gypsy said...

The Monty Python dork in me has just reared her cheeky head.

Mr. Praline: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

Owner: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

But the whole bird in the freezer thing? That's kinda creepy. I mean, why? And apparently the family has just gone along with the monstrosity.

Blech. I'm all squicked out by it now.

MoDigli said...

oh my gosh - she actually admitted that weird fact?! The picture of the bird is really cute - but that one is ALIVE!!!!

CRAZY!

tall glass of vino said...

hahaha! While living in Georgia, a coworker of mine once came in and announced to everyone that he'd hit a deer on the drive in to the office. We were horrified. He just hiked up his belt, and said, "yep, go take a look, I threw'er in the back of my truck".

Sure enough. Buck in a truck.

Good thing it was pretty chilly out.

DetoxSmurf said...

So what happened to the boob pic we were promised...

teahouse said...

Euw. Didn't Imelda Marcos do this to her husband after he died? She kept him in a freezer for several weeks before his funeral.

Delta said...

That's disgusting! The worst part is she would move it from house to house! Aren't you suppose to go through your stuff and throw things out when you move?

Miss Fire said...

VB - What a lovely lunch time story...

Gypsy - I thought the SAME THING (Python rocks).

Vino - That's Georgia for ya.

Matilda Jane said...

Oh, that bird is so pretty! Now I see why she kept it.

Anne said...

It amazes me the strage things that people do...it really amazes me the strange things that people do that they are willing to tell people about.

Brian said...

Here's a thought:
Tell Boss Lady to steal the bird, and have it taxidermied for her mother for a Christmas gift! That way she can keep it and show it off.

NotCarrie said...

Ew I would not eat a think out of that freezer!

Lisa said...

Yeah. That would totally turn me off of ice cream -- having to get it out of the fridge while its next to the bird.

Virginia Belle said...

becky-- yes it is!

ster-- supposedly the bird is still perfectly intact, minus the eyeballs. (why on earth would you dig it out to look at it anyway???)

red-- ewwww! that would have been much worse.

gypsy-- cool points to you for getting monty python into it! i love python. i had forgotten about that skit.

mo-- yeah, that's what i was wondering-- why would you even tell anyone about that??

TGOV-- i can totally picture that down here in the south. it could definitely happen. and yes, it's good it was cold. because it would have STUNK in the summer.

detox-- was there something to this story that reminded you of boobs? :D i knew i was creating a monster....i guess i'm just a big tease!

teahouse-- ugh, i had never heard that. as if she couldn't get weirder.

delta-- i agree. that is the worst part! i mean, there must have been a moment where she thought, "hmm...well, i'll take the bird with me...."

MJ-- please tell me you are kidding.

anne-- i know. doing it is one thing, but telling people is another.

brian-- yes, i am wondering why this hasn't been done already. i think that if i were her daughter, i would have already secretly disposed of the bird. you can't tell me she would miss it. like she's going to open her freezer and say "hey! where's my painted bunting? it was right here!"

notcarrie & lisa -- i'd be right there with you. this is probably the only circumstance where i would turn down ice cream.

Christina_the_wench said...

Why are people so frickin' weird? WHY?????