The Playa

I ain't a playa, I just crush a lot. --Big Pun

I can't believe I just quoted Big Pun in my blog. I'm really exposing my terrible taste in music right now. Anyway, the playa I'm referring to here would be.....me. Let me explain...

Last night I was running late to meet Danger Dan. I wanted to call him to tell him I was running late, but I had left his number in my other purse. Then I realized he didn't have my cell number, just my work number. Oops. Oh well. So, I got to the bar where we were planning on meeting, and by then I was 10-15 minutes late. I felt really bad--you should be on time for first dates! Or at least call! I'm such a spaz. So I walked into the bar, and saw an attractive guy who resembled Danger Dan.

"Are you Dan?" I asked.
"Nope. Are you meeting someone here?" he asked.
"Yeah. It's sort of a blind date, and I'm really late." I explained.
"You don't know what he looks like?"
"Well, he sort of looks like you. I was kind of hoping you were him. But I'm going to go over here and see if he's sitting at a table. Thanks."

So I kept looking around the bar. Then I looked in the dining area...no one was sitting alone, no one looked like Dan. Dang! It was official. I was the stander-upper.

I walk back into the bar and said to the attractive guy, "Hey, I know you aren't Dan, but would you like to be?"

"Yeah!" he replied.

I sat down next to him, ordered a "near beer", lit a cig, and began to flirt madly. I asked if he minded that I smoke. "Actually, it looks like I'm in good company," I said as I noticed his cigarettes lying on the bar. We had a smoke together as I explained to him my situation and how I think I'm an asshole because I just stood someone up. I felt so terrible! And no way to remedy the situation since I didn't have a number to call. At some point I said something funny because I remember making him laugh. (What can I say? Sometimes I'm at my best under pressure!) He asked me how I was getting set up with Danger Dan. I told him match.com. He said he had heard about online dating but didn't think it was really his style.

"Yeah, you don't need any help, do you? You've got girls just walking up to you!"

He chuckled. I asked him about the big gift bag sitting in front of him. He said it was a Christmas present from his friend. He pulled out an embroidered hand towel with "Mark" written in red script. He introduced me to the gift-giver. She was an older (drunk) lady named Carolyn (or was it Marilyn?). Anyway, they were friends. Then Mark introduced himself. "Yeah, it's Mark, I know. I saw the towel," I said and smiled. We started talking some more when...

I saw Danger Dan walk in. Whew! I wasn't the late one. Thank goodness. I thanked Mark for listening to me, said it was nice to meet him and proceeded with my original plans.

Danger Dan was surprisingly...super! He's one of those people who is really comfortable with himself, which instantly put me at ease. He had tried to call me to tell me he was running late..we had a good laugh at our confusion. He was really understanding, which I appreciated. We hit it off instantly. He tells great stories--I was laughing a lot. It was going really well, and I was definitely feeling a connection.

I excused myself to use the restroom. I had just started to uh, get situated when I heard somone call my name. What on earth...? I thought.

I came out and saw Carolyn. She said she needed to talk to me. But after I was done doing what I needed to do. Ok.....

I was washing my hands when she said she followed me to the bathroom because Mark had a good time talking to me and wanted to get my phone number. She said he was a really nice guy and he is single...etc. etc. I said, "Ok, sounds good to me! I was actually kind of hoping he was my date!" (Mark was pretty cute! I was glad to know he wasn't married or anything.) And then began a frantic search for a pen/piece of paper. This was made all the more difficult by Carolyn's drunken ramblings. "Ok, ok! Let's do this! I'm on another date!" I wanted to say to her. Of course, as luck would have it, I had neither pen nor paper. Carolyn didn't have anything with her. By this point, it was getting kind of obvious that I was taking a long time to pee, which made me panic even more. Finally I stuck my head out of the bathroom, grabbed a busboy, took his pen and jotted my work email down on the back of one of those "Buy ten, get one free" punch cards I found in my wallet. (I'm not big on giving my number out freely. Email is safer.) I shoved it in Carolyn's hand and jetted out of the bathroom.

Dan looked at me a little suspiciously. I told him a crazy drunk lady cornered me in the bathroom and made me listen to her marital problems. Which is mostly true. (I hate lying! But I really couldn't tell the truth, right?!) Dan went to the bathroom, so I took that opportunity to check my cell messages. TOTGA had called. I couldn't hear the message, and then I accidentally deleted it. Shoot! Oh well. When he came back, Dan invited me to go eat dinner with him and some of his friends, which I normally would have done, but I thought I had dinner plans with TOTGA.

Soon Dan and I left. I didn't get a chance to make eye contact with Mark before leaving. I didn't really have any good opportunities. I'm hoping that won't deter him!

Being a playa is hard work!!!

I called TOTGA back, but got his voice mail. I left a message, but he never called me back. I guess what goes around comes around.